Do-It-Yourself Fatigue
We live in a culture that celebrates independence, grit, and “doing it all”. Whether it’s raising kids, running a business, paying bills, managing our health, or staying afloat of the rest of life’s responsibilities, we are constantly in the midst of doing something.
But what happens when you’re tired — really TIRED?! What happens when you aren’t feeling equipped to do it all? That is what I call do-it-yourself fatigue.
It’s not just physical exhaustion. It’s the emotional weight of being the planner, provider, encourager, problem solver, and safety net all rolled into one human being.
While it isn’t easy, there are ways to navigate your I-N-D-E-P-E-N-D-E-N-T season without total burnout:
Acknowledge the Fatigue Without Shame - Too often we feel guilty for being tired. We think, “other people do this, why can’t I?”. The truth is— doing everything alone is exhausting because humans aren’t designed to operate in isolation. Saying “I’m tired because I’ve been carrying more than one person should”, is not weakness— it is honesty. Tell yourself the truth.
Create “Micro-Support” Moments - Even in the absence of a big village, you may be able to cultivate small doses of support within your reach— a 5-min check-in call with a trusted friend, asking a coworker or neighbor for a helping hand, scheduling an hour of PTO at shift’s end to feel less rushed to the next task, or reaching out to sisters from your faith community for some encouragement and affirmation.
Automate A Break with Built-in Rest - Mental clutter adds to fatigue. On occasion (but regularly enough), lighten your load by outsourcing household essentials— schedule meal-prep and house cleaning services to give yourself a much-needed break and use the time saved to intentionally rest.
Redefine Strength - Most importantly, it is vital to redefine what strength means to you. It isn’t about how much you can hold, it’s about knowing when to lay something down. Have the wisdom to decide what doesn’t have to get done today and adjust accordingly! Incomplete lists are not failure, they’re self-preservation.
Pause for the cause, invest in balance, and create space to remove your cape— if only for a moment.
With love, Marian
